Just Your Ordinary Shape Shifting Girl

Things had been good. No, things had been GREAT! Pretty much everyone knew about Quil and I and our relationship after the party last week. We were happy and having fun and pretending like everything was right I guess. Maybe that should have been my first clue. Quil was going to meet Claire last night for some fun but before he left to see her we decided that we could spend some time together at our spot on Second Beach. I was there waiting for him and we had time to just hang out and talk. I asked when he was supposed to be at Claire's house and he realized that he was running late. Thats about the time that his phone rang. Claire's mom was frantic trying to find her. Naturally, Quil took off scared that something awful had happened. He phased and went to look for her and I ran in to the woods calling for her. I decided that searching as a wolf was easier and phased too. She hadn't gone far and we picked up her scent before much time had gone by. Thank Goodness she was saf...

The last 10 posts were all transfered over from my ning blog and occured over the course of 3 or 4 months. To read them on their original dates, please go to http://olympiccovenrpg.ning.com/profiles/blog/list?user=296hax7rhostm I'll try to keep this one updated more often from here on out. Hope you enjoy and come follow all of our great characters. Follow me on twitter at www.twitter.com/seattlewillow

SeattleWillow @_Quil_Ateara *Hears the front door slam and pulls away from you quickly trying to catch her breath.* What was that? _Quil_Ateara @SeattleWillow *Shrugs* I didn't hear anything. *Starts kissing you again* _joeblack +Yells up the steps.+ Hey @seattlewillow. Are you here? +Looks around and sees her phone on the table.+ She must be around SeattleWillow @_Quil_Ateara *Shoves you back, panicked.* Sh!t Quil! @_joeblack 's home!! _Quil_Ateara @SeattleWillow WHAT!!!?! *Falls off the bed, looking for his clothes* SeattleWillow @_Quil_Ateara *Looking frantically for her clothes.* I thought he said he wasn't going to be home until tomorrow! _joeblack +Sets down the keys and suitcase and starts up the steps. Calls for @seattlewillow again.+ _Quil_Ateara @SeattleWillow Dammit, Willow!! He is coming up here... *Panics* Where is my jeans? SeattleWillow @_Quil_Ateara *Shoves your jeans at you and pushes you in to the closet.* Just shhhh... * Shuts the door & jumps in bed....

Last week I was fishing with my dad when he and I started talking about camping. He thought it was so funny that I had never been camping in my life. My response, whose fault is that? Was my mom going to pack up Layla and I and drive us out of Seattle to sleep in a tent? Not likely, her belief and mine had always been that that is the reason that God created hotels. Later that week, Claire and Quil were spending some time together and decided to go camping as well. Claire asked Quil if he and I were friends and if I could go with them. He told her it wasn't really my thing but that he would ask. When he asked I told him I would go and he seemed surprised. Am I really that much out of it that he thinks I wouldn't even try to camp. I'll do anything once, so of course I was in. That decision led me to the startling conclusion that not only did I know nothing about camping but, that I had nothing to camp with. Mike Newton stopped in to the diner one morning and who better to as...

Between patrolling, the diner, my classes, and trying to make time to sleep I feel like my time is pretty well consumed. I had been studying and patrolling and all weekend long, my dad was out of town so the house was painfully quiet, and I needed a break. I went downstairs to the pantry and found everything I needed to make lasagna and brownies. So, to give myself a brain break, I started to cook something besides cereal and PB&J for dinner. All that food, a quiet house, now all I wanted was company so I texted Quil and asked him to come over for dinner. Thats when the idea hit me that this was a date night so I decided to light some candles and turn on music. Everything was set, dinner was ready and then Quil came over and everything was perfect. Since the weather was great, we ate dinner on the back patio. I'm still amazed at how comfortable and easy things are with him. Part of me feels like I am breaking some unspoken rule by feeling the way I do, but the rest of me is too...

Last Friday Becca and I drove down to Seattle to do a little vintage shopping for her bakery. I told her earlier in the week about some great little shops I knew of where we could pick up old concert posters and t-shirts. In case you're lost, she is doing the bakery in a sort -of Hard Rock Cafe theme. Its going to be amazing with murals and bright colors and the best thing - the uniforms are concert tees and jeans. Finally, no more diner uniform! While we were there we talked a little bit about what it was like for me growing up in Seattle and how it feels when I go back now. My mom and sister, Layla, still live in Seattle. In case you missed a giant chunk of my personal history, I wasn't raised in La Push. I was born here but then my super non-traditional mom decided that she needed out, and that she didn't want her girls growing up believing in a bunch of silly myths and legends. I guess I shot that right out of the water for her LOL! So, living in Seattle for 16 years, y...

There are some things that you just can't understand unless you are living them. Its like when people say "I know how you feel" but there is no way they really can because its a private pain or a situation that is so personal that NO ONE could ever understand - unless they had experienced that same circumstance. I watch Quil with Claire and I see how happy he is and how his whole world lights up when she is around and its amazing! I hear Jake talk about having to leave the Rez once the Cullens have to leave Forks and see how much he wants to stay but that he would follow Nessa to the ends of the Earth. Then there is Paul and Rachel and Jared and Kim and this amazing tie that they have to each other. And then there is Sam and I don't even know where to begin... So, to begin this little brain explosion I need to say that the people I see who have imprinted seem very happy. They are happy. There is no question in my mind about that. They know what they want and how it fe...

I will never ever look at a marshmallow the same way again! Quil and I I met at Second Beach last night to have a bonfire and make some s'mores. The weather was perfect and drew out some of the area tourists. Who wouldn't want to come to Second Beach, I mean look at it, its beautiful! Quil burnt one of his marshmallows to a crisp and decided that he couldn't possibly eat it so he threw it. One of the hikers saw it and wondered what it was. We heard them and laughed and I decided to grab some more and throw them at them. Well, I accidentally hit one of them in the back of the head *LOL* and they turned around to come find out who was throwing marshmallows at them. Quil and I laughed and ran to hide from them stopping at one of the caves on the beach. If you've never been there, they are almost magical. (I posted a picture below.) We ran back in to the cave and hid in one of the corners. There wasn't much room to move so Quil and I were close together with my hands on...

So much has happened since the last time I wrote anything. Its not that nothing has happened, its that so much has happened I guess. Life is pretty much back to normal for me except those reminders that never quite seem to go away - a song, a place, people. Matt never fully disappears and to be honest, its nice. Just last night I had dinner with some of the guys from his band in Seattle. I was at the airport arriving from Wisconsin (well, Chicago actually) when I ran into Ryan and his girlfriend Krista. It was nice to catch up with them and see how everyone was doing. I'm jumping ahead of myself... lets go back further. For the past few weeks I have been getting on with life as usual for me. I have been spending lots of time with my friends and just having fun. I can't possibly go back and give you all the details (lucky for me Quil is really good about updating his blog!) but Embry, Leah, Quil, Sam, Kim, Emily, and I went to get tattoos, and see Harry Potter, Becca came home a...

I feel like I finally have the composure and energy to write this blog that has been weighing on my mind for a week now. Last Sunday, Matt went to Second Beach to hang out with Jake and Sam. They were having some guy time and getting to know each other better since Matt was such a huge part of my life. I am so lucky to have family that loves me enough to accept someone like Matt. I know he wasn't their favorite guy in the world, but they were willing to give him a chance and thats what counts. Anyway, while they were there, Matt must have decided that he needed to man up and jump. I don't know what he was thinking because the cliffs at Second Beach are higher and more dangerous than those at First Beach and he didn't like the jump he did there with me. He made his way up the cliffs and jumped. He must have not jumped out far enough because somewhere he hit his head on a rock. His family told me that he didn't suffer long and that a recovery would have been impossible wi...

So, the rumors are true. After a crazy night just over a week ago Matt and I are "on a break". He seems to understand that right now and has promised to behave himself. In case you missed the drama, you can catch up on Quil's blog or Matt's blog. They both have the story and I don't feel like I need to go in to the details. What matters the most is that Matt's jaw is wired shut for six weeks and he and I are doing okay as just friends for right now. I really need for him to back off and not to push things. He has no idea how much damage he does to our relationship by getting so angry with not only Quil, Embry, and Paul, but with me for being with them. I can't explain that connection to him in any way that would make sense so until he accepts it, we are at an impass.

So much has happened since I last updated. I would like to say that having Matt in Forks has been great for us, but it has been just the opposite. It all started when I went cliff diving with Paul last week. We were jumping and having a great time when Matt came to find me. The plan was for us to go out later on in the evening and have some fun - we never made it that far. Matt got mad and shot off his mouth to Paul. Paul got mad at the way Matt treats me. Yelling turned to fists flying and Matt ended up with a broken nose. A couple of nights later, I was waiting on the beach talking with Quil when Nadia and Matt showed up. I guess things must have looked a little suspicious. We were actually just talking about then when they showed up. Quil grabbed my hand to show that we didn't feel unusually warm to each other but only to Matt and Nadia. Nadia saw this and heard only part of our conversation and assumed the worse. Matt being Matt was furious and swung at Quil. Nose break number ...

My head is spinning. I’m back to the Uley vs. Black drama that has been a part of my life since the day my mom moved us to Seattle. Team Uley (which is of course my mom) has a wonderful love/hate relationship with Team Black (my dad). There has always been an equal amount of respect, love and loathing in their relationship and it has come back to haunt me again. Sam and Emily are back and I am so happy to have the other half of my family around. I have missed them and can’t wait to have some time to catch up with them both. It seemed so complete last night to finally have them there for the pack dinner at Clearwater’s house. I know there are a lot of decisions to be made by everyone but this decision for me is forcing me to choose between my family. Do I choose Sam or do I choose Jake and how do I know which one I should choose? To me, they are both great leaders who have the best for the pack and me in mind. This decisions is eating me up inside. So, Jake and Sam are problem #1. Now, ...